Today was the first day of the rest of our lives.  It was also the last day of school.  EVER!!! (whoohoo)

It was also very sad to let go of something that has grown as part of who you are.  It feels so unrealistic.  I can hardly believe that we have finished.  Finally finished.

Here are a few photos of me and my friends on our last school day ever…we had our matric shirts on (I’m the short fat one) :

So now it is time to bid high school life farewell.

With this I end my school career and begin with a new life.

Goodbye.

The worst thing that can happen to a friendship between a girl and a guy, is when the guy gets a girl

I’m fed up with it.  I’ve lost countless friends because they all got girlfriends…why are girls so jealous.  They always have to make a statement that they have a guy.  That my friend is HER boyfriend.

What’s the point?  I don’t get it at all.  Maybe I’m just not that girlish, but if my guy has a close, trusted girl friend then it’s fine by me.  Or do I just show a tendency to be untrustworthy??

I’m tired of being at the losing end

I wish…

I wish…

I wish I was a fish

Everybody makes mistakes.  Sometimes your forgiven and at other times, life just needs to go on.  No matter what you do or say.  Yet, your past catches up with you, and with it, the life you left behind (and the people in it) does as well.

To make a long story short:  Most of you know about Jason.  He’s the most written about individual on this blog.  Why?  Because he’s stuck in my heart.  Glued with Super Extra Strength glue.  No matter what happens, I can’t seem to get him out of my system.  I despise him, but I also love him dearly, with all my heart.  But as what I love him, I don’t yet no.

We had a fight three weeks back and haven’t spoken ever since that day.  Yesterday I heard the news that he is coming to visit.  I also heard that he wants to see me.  Is this at all wise?  Won’t we just dig up all our old, hidden feelings and then just get hurt again.  I don’t want to cry over him again.  Just this once, I would like to cry with him.  I want to hug him just one last time.  Make him laugh just one more time.  Share a Spur dessert with him just once more.

I really am at a point where I don’t know what to do.  What will happen when (and if) we see each other.  Will our eyes be filled with stars and our hearts overflowing with joy?  Or will we coldly stare at each other, blindly blaming the other for everything that went wrong with us.

I really do love him.  I knew that last year already.  The question is: Does he love me back?

Is this an opportunity to set our friendship on the right path or is it a disaster waiting to happen.  I don’t want to damage his heart any further.  I abandoned him in his time of need, I ripped out his heart with my words.  Is his visiting maybe our second chance?